We All Have Fears and Insecurities

Hilary Silver
4 min readAug 5, 2020

Let’s talk for a minute about your fears and insecurities. Yes, no matter how smart, successful or accomplished you are, you have them. How do I know? Because we all do.

Fears and Insecurities

What are yours? Well, here are a few common ones:

Rejection, abandonment, getting hurt, being disappointed (again). F’ing up, picking the wrong guy (again), being alone for the rest of your life. On and on we could go. And honestly, all of these fears are REAL. I’m not here to tell you they aren’t!

In addition to being real, these fears are much more powerful than you might realize. They have you hiding behind a wall. They are the reason you’re not letting anyone ‘in’, or are pretending to be someone you aren’t. When you find yourself over-giving or over-pleasing in relationships, your fears are impacting you. Pushing away the right men, picking men who live far away, being too busy with work? Yep, there are those fears again. Sometimes our fears and insecurities even cause us to focus on the wrong thing to ‘fix’, instead of getting real about the actual problem. Sound familiar?

When you do all of these things on dates or in relationships, FEAR is at the wheel. It’s driving your life forward and determining every move you make. Meanwhile, you’re a mere passenger in the back seat.

So here’s the truth about love and fear…

Courage Is Required

It takes courage and an open heart to let love in. Think about it: you’ve been collecting stories and experiences (for better And worse) since you were a little girl. Your fears and insecurities have been growing for that long as well! It can feel completely understandable to stay stuck in that mindset. In fact, it almost seems like it makes sense to let fears and insecurities rule your life (after all, won’t that keep you safe?).

However…the people in happy, healthy intimate relationships were willing to overcome their fears. They examined their core beliefs and stories, and chose to create new ones rather than remaining stuck.

No matter what you’ve been through, it’s up to you to change your story. You need to take control of your thoughts and your beliefs, because those are what create your fears.

The Real Question About Fear and Insecurities

The real question is: Are you willing to do the work to overcome your fears about love and intimacy?

We’re talking about the fears and insecurities that keep you single and locked in place!

Will you do the work to up-level your self worth and your mindset? Or are you going to tolerate not getting what you actually want? (That always comes with a long list of excuses, reasons and avoidance behaviors. It’s not a fun place to be!)

TRUTH:

We are ALL inherently lovable. We are all here to be seen and heard. And of course we desire to experience genuine connection! Really take that in for a minute. The universe doesn’t have favorites, and love and connection are for everyone! Whatever your fears and insecurities are, you CAN overcome them! You CAN find love and connection, with yourself and with the man of your dreams.

It all comes down to committing to yourself and to your dream FULL-OUT. If you’re not prepared to do that, you can’t expect anything to change. Not now, not ever. Because hoping, praying, wishing, dreaming and waiting for something to happen are not strategies.

You Have to WANT To Change Your Story

My clients know their way isn’t working. They’ve been grinding their gears, and they are done waiting around for things to get better. They absolutely aren’t willing to be in the same place this time next year. (Especially as it’s often the same place they were last year and the year before.) They come to me ready to do the work to get past their fears and insecurities. Not later. Not maybe.

100% YES. 100% committed to doing it right now. Are you ready to change your story?

If you know you want this, I’d love to connect. Here’s who I’m looking for:

• A high performing corporate or business woman, scientist, professional woman or similar. You have proven to yourself and the world that you know how to be successful at work…but somehow haven’t figured it out in love.

• Ready to step out of your comfort zone and do things differently than you have always done — you value personal growth and are COACHABLE.

• Action-oriented, knowing that healing work and mindset shifts are essential, but not enough. You get that it’s in the action taking and DOING that things start to really shift.

• Resourceful and 1000% committed. You’re not going to give up at the first (or the second or the third) obstacle. Keeping your goal in mind and knowing that this IS your top priority ensures that you are not going to let anything or anyone steal this chance from you!

In other words, I can only help women who are ready to help themselves. If this sounds like you, Book Your Love Breakthrough Session NOW!

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Hilary Silver

I help accomplished professional women live their best life! Be Extraordinary💋 💪Make Manifesting Your Super Power LOVE + Be Loved❤️ hilarysilver.com