Stop Dating If You Want To Find Love (Do THIS Instead!)

Hilary Silver
4 min readOct 30, 2020

Stop dating! Stop looking for love! JUST STOP!

Ready to stop dating?

Ready to stop the swiping, networking, meet-ups, coffee dates and zoom calls? To stop the obsessing, questioning and try- try- trying?

The women I work with are SO ready to stop with all the craziness, because none of it ever seem to work. It just creates a cycle of desperation and frustration. And the truth is…

None of these things will help you attract a high caliber man. They won’t help you experience real love that lasts. NONE of them.

Here’s the reality:

Focusing on all the wrong things only keeps women like you stuck spinning their wheels. The dating apps and shitty DM comments and awful first dates….

they’re just keeping you stuck on the hamster wheel of dead end dating.

And for highly accomplished professional women, this costs time and energy you don’t have. Am I right?

Same Actions = Same Results

The more you keep at it, constantly experiencing the same results, the more it leaves you feeling disappointed, embarrassed and confused. How the hell can you be so successful at work…yet struggle so much in your love life?

Why does *she* seem to have it so easy, and you can’t even find a halfway decent guy to grab coffee with?

And yet….what else is there? Even though you know it’s never worked before, you can’t bring yourself to stop dating, stop swiping, stop seeking. But the more you keep doing the same things, the worse off you are.

The more you focus on the wrong things, the more wrong results you’ll keep piling up.

For context, here are a few things NOT worth focusing on:

  • Which app to be on
  • Where to go to meet men IRL (in real life)
  • How to date during COVID
  • What to do or say to get a second date
  • Asking yourself, “Do I message first or let him reach out?” or
  • “Do I text him after our date, or wait for him to text me?”

If I pretty much just summed up everything you’ve thought mattered when it comes to online dating, we need to talk. Because I know that, in reality, the harder you try (and the more you focus on that stuff I just mentioned), the more disheartening it becomes when none of it works. Constant failure and frustration just continues to keep real love out of reach.

So let me ask this important question:

If Mr. Amazing knocked on your door right now:

  • Are you 1000% certain you’d know what to do with him?
  • Would you be ready for him?
  • Would you recognize him as Mr. RIGHT?

Really think through those and answer them. I’ll wait.

And now that you’ve done that, answer these:

  • Would you look past him and pick another Mr WRONG?
  • Would you push him away, or show up the same way with him as you did the last few times and set yourself up for another disappointment?

Stop Dating Until You’ve Answered These

DO YOU:

  • Worry at all about messing it up, sabotaging or making mistakes?
  • Have any fear at all around getting hurt again, not being ‘enough’ or repeating unhealthy patterns of the past?

If the answer is anything less than “Hilary, I’m 1000% certain I got this relationship thing in the bag”, then pay close attention.

There is no point in going through all the dating drama to find Mr. Amazing when you have fear, self-doubt, insecurities and carry past relationship baggage. Why? Because it will subconsciously sabotage and block real love from happening every time.

Who are YOU to tell me THAT???

I’ve been a clinical psychotherapist, master coach and mentor for 20 years. I’ve worked with thousands of successful career women who go from stuck and wondering “What am I doing wrong?” or “What’s wrong with me that I can’t have love?” … to experiencing the healthiest relationships they’ve ever known.

In a very short time, our clients begin to date more confidently. They find themselves effortlessly attracting high caliber men at their level. They get into relationships where they finally feel LOVED, VALUED & ADORED.

That is because what we do skips all the shallow, surface level strategies and tactics. Instead, it gets to the core issues and root causes quickly, so women just like you can finally be as successful in love as they are in the rest of their lives.

You’ve likely been spending 100% of your time focusing on addressing the SYMPTOMS of a problem instead of dealing with the ROOT CAUSE of a problem. And that is why you’re stuck on the hamster wheel of dead end dating!

Ready for a change?

So if you are ready to deal with the REAL problems that are causing you to remain single…ready to stop dating…. to stop desperately try-try-trying…

then check out my FREE webinar on the 5 shifts you need to start making ASAP!

Let’s get you UNSTUCK so you can BREAKTHROUGH and FINALLY HAVE REAL LOVE THAT LASTS!

--

--

Hilary Silver

I help accomplished professional women live their best life! Be Extraordinary💋 💪Make Manifesting Your Super Power LOVE + Be Loved❤️ hilarysilver.com